the two professors

SARAH AND HAROLD

This Is The Lyrical And Fictional Short Story Of Two Star-Crossed Lovers, Not Unlike Romeo And Juliet.  It Was Fun To Write And Hopefully You’ll Like It, Too.

By Izzy Ess Of Childishness

Professor Harold Weinstein and Professor Sarah Sandringham had introduced themselves at Bannister McLeod’s Obstetrics Hospital in Hamilton, Ontario, in Canada.  They both were there to learn about the latest research on delivering of babies.  Harold was attracted to the pulchritude of Professor Sandringham while Sarah was attracted to the silk Italian suit Professor Weinstein wore.  At a break for lunch, they shared a tiny table in the Hospital’s huge cafeteria.  They started talking and discovered that they shared strong interests in some classic foreign movies, kinky sex, disorganized religion, dirty politics and the deliverance of babies, eh?  They smiled a lot and talked a lot and missed the afternoon of seminars.

The two professors took a walk and found out Hamilton had miles of walking paths along the shore of Lake Ontario, as well as some neat mountain paths that could be climbed to get atop the mountain for a lovely view of Hamilton and Burlington and Stoney Creek.  They shared a steak and lobster dinner at the Hotel Royale atop the precipice and started holding hands atop the table and then touching knees below.  It seemed so natural that these professors signed into the Hotel as Jane and Johnny Smith and took a room for that whole night.

Suffice to say, the bodies of Professors Sandringham and Weinstein fit together in all weird and wonderful positions.  The fits were so terrific, Harold and our Sarah stayed in their room for the whole duration of the conference on Obstetrics.  Then, they dressed and left to catch their WestJet Aeroplanes for Vancouver and New York and their respective families and spouses.

When next the lovers met, it was the next Obstetrics Conference in Los Angeles.  They registered, picked up agendae, summaries, opinions and the pharmaceutical free gifts, inducements and free samples, and then left the Conference Centre.  Then, they made their way to Monterrey and spent the whole week in a small motel that overlooked Pacific Ocean.  There, they found, anew, that their two bodies fit together with enthrallment and excitement way beyond what they had felt before.  They expressed their love in lovely ways, as well as kinky ways.  In old Chicago, for the next Obstetrics Conference, they found a lovely bed and breakfast in Sheboygan, on Lake Michigan, renewing their enthrallment and excitement.  Next, it was Miami where they found a cozy old hotel in old Fort Lauderdale with views of the Atlantic Ocean.  Sarah and her Harold were in love and in some deep appreciations of each other’s charms and attributes.  Her pulchritude and his Italian suits continued to be magical for these two star-struck, highly educated, loving, professorial great experts in deliverance of babies.

In Minneapolis, the lovers did their usual performance as attendees at the semi-annual Obstetrics Conference in the Hennepin Grand Conference Centre, of the University of Minnesota School of Medicine.  They found a small hotel in old Wayzata near the Minnetonka Lake and Tonka Toy Amusement Centre with a patio which was a dock for boats upon the Lake.  A winter storm beset them and froze everything, including them.  The block of ice with their two closely fitted naked bodies was preserved in a big freezer at the University for Scientific Studies for posterity, and for the titillating grand amusement of all the future students of Obstetrics and the Gynecology, the Sociology and Anthropology, Paleontology and the Philosophy, the Arts and Music.  Composers of fine music and fine lyrics were enticed to re-create the history of star-struck lovers, everywhere and evermore.  An opera, “Professors of Obstetrics,” still gets many audiences clapping quite enthusiastically, to this day, when it dramatically ends by showing the big block of ice with frozen lovers, pulchritudinous Professor Sarah Sandringham and her most well-dressed lover, the Professor Harold Weinstein.

Some librettist wrote the lyrics that do follow:

Act I, scene v

Professor Weinstein:

“Oh, Sarah, I love you in every way:

I love you upside down and in the hay;

I love you inside out and nude and lewd;

I love you at sea level, altitude;

I love your honeypot and lovely breasts;

I love your quiet moaning and the crests

Of pleasure that you do experience.”

Professor Sandringham:

“Oh, Harold I do love your silken suits,

Your leather thongs, your spurs and leather boots;

I love your manhood, long and very strong;

I love your words of wisdom, right or wrong;

I love your arms around my waist and chest;

I love the way you tongue my heaving breast

And purposefully flub your chess defence.”

The plots for Operas and Operettas were amazingly quite similar to this short story.  With this quite final, quite ironic, observation, this is logically quite

THE END

© izzy sommers, md

Welland, Canada

January 6, 2014