menachim

Menachim

Mental Case

A Sagacious Saga Of One

Man’s Envious Big Burdens

By Izzy Ess Of Envious

Menachim Mental Case was born with an enormous manhood that engendered penis envy of both boys and girls of his Collegiate in Manhattan, the Fourth Street Secondary School.  All the teachers were impressed as they paraded him out for the auditoriums and special ceremonies of the School.  They all had envy, too.  Despite all these distractions, Menny had outstanding Academic and Athletic marks in Chemistry and Physics, Geometry, Trigonometry and Algebra, English, Spanish, Accounting, Typing, Filing, Handwriting and Embroidery, Cooking, Baking and Decorating, Basketball, Badminton, Gymnastics and Chess.  He won some trophies in New York State Collegiate Tournaments in Chess, Badminton, Mathematics and old Spanish.

His prowess as a sexual machine was legendary.  His reputation amongst students, teachers and the other mothers was outstanding.  Unofficially, he was the champion of Sex.  This started with his Orthodox Bar Mitzvah in the Bronx and within a year, his statewide reputation engendered Kudos from the female governor, Ms. Bella Bella Bella, whose election was a shoe-in when she brought along Menachim to be her manager and campaign companion.

After graduation, his concerned parents, Moishe and Maria Mental Cases, moved to Illinois and enrolled Menachim in the Northwestern University in Evanston, just north of Metropolitan Chicago.  He made the Varsity Badminton squad, the Chess Team and the water polo team and helped to bring the championships home.  He was a regular on their outstanding debating team and won great honours, trophies and awards, thereby.  He was in line for scholarships in Badminton and Chess, Spanish and the Mathematics.  He was a whiz at The Theory of Everything, String Theory and the complicated Mathematics and great Physics in this area.  The Argonne National Laboratory, in Batavia, took him in for part-time studies and the Government bequeathed him special Fellowships to help him out financially and scholastically.  He graduated quite sum laude and was Valedictorian of his graduating class and spokesman for the Student Council as their president.  A Rhode Scholarship awaited him and he chose to go to the giant accelerator programme in CERN in Geneva Switzerland.

And what of his big manhood apparatus?  Well, he used that to advantage everywhere, quite surreptitiously and discreetly.  All the members of the female football team were serviced as were the members of the female floor hockey team and the female teaching staff of the University.  By the time he left for Switzerland, he’d sired a dozen children and was named in several paternity suits by several female teams and associations.  His lawyer got him off on the real grounds that he was mentally ill and knew not what he did, although the women testified he knew full well what he was doing.  The psychiatric court-appointed folks supported Menny and his lawyer to establish mental anguish and the diagnosis of distinctive Paranoid Schizophrenia, the kind that Hitler, Stalin and many CEOs possessed.  If the judge was female, it was a cinch she needed some convincing in the privacy of her private parts and chambers.  They were, indeed, convinced he was a special case.

In Geneva Switzerland, he made it with entire laboratories of the female staff and supervisory Scientific and Advisory distaffs.  The Alps did beckon him and he just joined the Alpine Club of Female Climbers and was able to just mount them all and all the peaks in Switzerland.  He started with the Simi and advanced to the great Matterhorn, the Schreckhorn and the Jungfrau Joch.  At the peaks, he was often photographed completely mounting all the female climbers and the female Sherpas and the mountain ewes.  In two years he had sired a hundred offspring, including kids and Swiss toddlers.  There were no paternity hard issues because the Swiss were strong perfectionists and claimed that everything was planned and scheduled and just perfect!  The famous Postal Service issued stamps which featured his known likeness and his giant manhood so discreetly shown in bright red, like the Bernese great Black Bear, whose red penis and red tongue adorned the pennants everywhere.

Back in Illinois, several artists sculptured his outstanding manhood.  It was cast in bronze and was displayed in the famous Chicago Art great Institute’s large lobby.  The Guggenheim in NYC had an extra-large example in its first floor rotunda and like Jackson Pollock’s abstract, became a permanent possession and display.  The President of the USA, Susan Sarandon, after her experience with the real McCoy, had it declared a National Treasure and she was privileged to sample Menny’s tool, as often as she was able.  At one time, for a month, she invited Menachim to occupy the extension of the Presidential Suite and did allow her female staff and cabinet to try him out as many times as there were West Wing conferences.  President Sarandon saw to it that he was justly given the Congressional Honour Medal for Service way beyond the ecstasies of everyone.

Unfortunately, Menachim suffered Priapism and a huge blood clot did threaten him so much, he had to have an amputation.  Mrs. President and all her female staff had a prolonged period of mourning when Menny died of complications of his anticoagulant therapy, a kind of Disseminated Intravascular Coagulation which could not be treated or controlled.  He died of apoplexy in the President’s quite loving arms.  The funeral was quite exotic and it attracted all the female leaders of the world.

Two huge bronzed sculptures of Menachim Mental Case’s Manhood were erected, [sic,] right in the Oval Office and at Arlington’s quite famed National Cemetery where Menny was sadly buried and had a gravestone enscribed, “Here Lies One Big Manly Man!  Menachim Mental Case Did Die Of DIC, Before His Time.  May He Rest in Peace!  Amen and Hallelujah!”

THE END

© izzy sommers, md

Welland, Canada

October 20, 2013